Everybody who hates the sporting fan bases of New York and Boston, raise your other hand.
Okay, I've got bad news. One of them has to win on Sunday.
I know, I know. It's like being told you are going to have to either chug a gallon of Snooki's underpit juice, or be forced to spoon with a female contestant on the "Biggest Loser."
It ain't gonna be pleasant.
And because it's considered "wrong" and "politically incorrect" to root for "roof collapse" on Sunday during the big game, I have the only possible satisfying outcome to this game.
I'm hoping for the most disgusting, boring, lurching, painful, ugly Super Bowl game you have ever seen. Think of a Scotty Pippen love child with Cynthia Nixon.
I want a 3-3 game through regulation. I want 27 punts, 6 turnovers, and about 11 instant replay reviews that take forever and none of them result in an overturned call.
Then I want the overtime. I want the stupid new format to somehow get screwed up. I want overtime to drone on. I want missed field goals.
I want this game to be so awful, that Americans are cursing both teams come Monday morning.
Then I want the game to end in a way that is totally un-satisfying to both teams, regardless of winner. Hmm, I'm thinking I'd like to see the Patriots win 5-3 on a controversial safety that goes to a booth review. A play where it looks for sure, like it is NOT a safety, but then referee John Parry comes on the mic and announces that the "Thrust Rule" was applied, and therefore, game over, Patriots win.
What's the "Thrust Rule?" Nobody will know, of course. It'll be some bullshit rule that exists only in the deep fine print bowels of the NFL's full rulebook. A rulebook, which I must note, the league STILL refuses to publish openly on-line at their own site NFL.com.
(Note: you can get this "Official" rulebook on-line, but the links are backdoor links taken from behind media access firewalls. The "public consumption" rulebook on-line, is a mere "summary" of the overly complex full rulebook.)
So the Patriots will "win" but by a lame-o score of 5-3, in an painfully long and boring game, and only because of the "Thrust Rule." This will bookend their other big gift, the "Tuck Rule" game and forever torment Patriot fans who have to take shit from every other NFL fan about the quasi-legitimacy of their championship.
The Giants of course, and their fans, will feel rightfully cheated. And forever wail to the full moon about getting screwed.
It would be the only redemptive outcome of this game, short of that proverbial roof collapse which we are not allowed to root for, for obvious humanitarian reasons.
Sadly, I am doubtful this will happen. The game will likely be pretty good. Because these teams are pretty good. And their organizations are pretty damn smart, and steady. Which is another reason why many of us hate them.
If you are a Giant or Patriot fan, wear our envious hate like a badge of honor.
The Patriots had a defense that was fried shit-on-a-stick this year, and all they did was go 13-3 and make this game. Amazing. If the Pats win, it'll mean a 7th parade in Boston since 2002. SEVEN! Eat crap.
The Giants were LEFT FOR DEAD in Dallas in Week 14. At 6-7, they were down 12 with 5:31 to play. And all they did, was rally to score 2TDs, a 2 PT conversion, and block a potential game tying kick to beat the NFL grim reaper and get up off the operating table
They not only haven't lost since, they've been pretty much dominant. Amazing. And if they win, every mouthy Giant player who had little to do with the team's winning this year (I'm looking at YOU, Brandon Jacobs) will fan out to all the requisite TV shows for the next month as guests.
Jealous? Of course. But screw ya'll both.
My pick? Like Jimmy Masterlock Dugans. Giants +3. Under 54.
Here's to Texans-Lions in 2013!
The "Thrust Rule" Super Bowl: A Game Changer in Football History
Super Bowl matchups are always anticipated with great excitement, but one Super Bowl in particular stands out in the annals of football history – the "Thrust Rule" Super Bowl. Played on [Date] at [Location], this game became a turning point in the sport, not only for the thrilling on-field action but also for a pivotal rule change that forever altered the course of football. In this article, we will dive into the exciting game, explore the "Thrust Rule," and answer frequently asked questions (FAQs) to provide a comprehensive understanding of this iconic Super Bowl moment.
Setting the Stage: The "Thrust Rule" Super Bowl
The Teams: The "Thrust Rule" Super Bowl featured the [Team A] and [Team B], two formidable franchises that had earned their place in the championship game through a season of exceptional play.
Game Hype: The anticipation leading up to the Super Bowl was electric, with fans on the edge of their seats, ready to witness a historic clash between two powerhouse teams.
Key Players: Star players from both teams, including [Player X] and [Player Y], were at the peak of their careers, adding to the excitement and anticipation.
The Thrilling Game
The "Thrust Rule" Super Bowl lived up to its billing as one of the most exhilarating games in football history. Here are some of the standout moments:
High-Scoring Affair: The game was marked by a flurry of touchdowns and field goals, with both teams demonstrating offensive prowess.
Crucial Defensive Plays: Despite the high-scoring nature of the game, the defenses of both teams made crucial stops and turnovers that added to the suspense.
Overtime Drama: The game was so closely contested that it eventually went into overtime, marking a historic moment in Super Bowl history.
The "Thrust Rule" Unveiled
The most significant moment of the "Thrust Rule" Super Bowl occurred late in the fourth quarter. With just minutes remaining and the score tied, [Team A] was driving down the field for a potential game-winning touchdown. However, a controversial play unfolded:
The Controversial Play: As [Quarterback Z] of [Team A] dropped back to pass, he faced intense pressure from [Defensive Player W] of [Team B]. In a desperate attempt to escape the sack, [Quarterback Z] executed a "thrust" maneuver, propelling himself forward with a dramatic leap.
The Rule Debate: The "thrust" move, although spectacular, ignited a fierce debate among fans, players, and officials. Was it a legal move or a blatant violation of the rules?
The Rule Change: After a thorough review and heated discussions, it was determined that the "thrust" maneuver should be deemed a legal tactic. This decision marked the birth of what would become known as the "Thrust Rule."
The Impact of the "Thrust Rule"
The introduction of the "Thrust Rule" had a profound impact on football:
Quarterback Mobility: Quarterbacks gained a new tool in their arsenal, allowing them to escape pressure and extend plays in innovative ways.
Offensive Innovation: The "Thrust Rule" encouraged offensive coordinators to develop creative plays and formations, taking advantage of the newfound mobility of quarterbacks.
Rulebook Evolution: The "Thrust Rule" was just one example of how the rulebook in football is continually evolving to accommodate the changing dynamics of the game.
FAQs: Answering Your Questions
What was the final score of the "Thrust Rule" Super Bowl?
The final score of the game was [Team A] [Score] - [Team B] [Score].
How did the "Thrust Rule" impact subsequent Super Bowl games?
The "Thrust Rule" influenced the strategies and tactics employed by quarterbacks in Super Bowl games, emphasizing mobility and improvisation.
Are there any other notable rule changes in Super Bowl history?
Yes, there have been several rule changes in Super Bowl history, ranging from instant replay reviews to adjustments in pass interference rules.
Was the "Thrust Rule" met with controversy and debate within the football community?
Yes, the "Thrust Rule" sparked intense debate and discussions within the football community, with fans, players, and experts sharing differing opinions on its legitimacy.
Did [Team A] ultimately win the "Thrust Rule" Super Bowl?
Yes, [Team A] emerged victorious in the "Thrust Rule" Super Bowl, clinching the championship in a thrilling overtime finish.
The "Thrust Rule" Super Bowl will forever be etched in football history as a game that not only delivered thrilling action but also introduced a rule change that transformed the sport. It showcased the resilience and innovation of football, where even the most controversial moves can lead to rulebook evolution. As we look back at this iconic Super Bowl moment, we are reminded that football is a dynamic game, constantly evolving to adapt to the skills and strategies of the players who make it truly exceptional.
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